Mighty Hunter

Despite Max's rather loose interpretation of international business law, he does follow a strict set of rules and protocols in his social life. For example, he will only use a 30 year old cognac in his French toast with warm berry compote. Likewise, he will only use his Jägermeister Tap Machine when crafting his perfectly chilled beverages. The thought of using Anna's cooler is simply outrageous.

Another Episode of "Creepy Sundays"

"Um, let's just say I found out about steelwool and batteries the hard way - yeah." - Max

Sailing

Anna does not understand why she has to sail the pumpkin boat while Max cheers from the shore.

Decisions

Beng a hard core Metallica fan, Max has been eyeing a slab of Metallica granite for the kitchen counter tops. Anna, of course, keeps reminding him that Metallica is priced as a level 6 "exotic" slab and after the Fitz Casio craps table incident on Thursday he might have to reign in his budget. She recommends a nice level 1 priced slab of Verde Butterfly.

The Dogs Days of Summer

While it has been unseasonably cool around here, summer finally returned yesterday. Hence, we were all a little over heated after our daily interval training.

Sitting on the couch I said this must be the dogs days of summer. In between sips of lemonade Anna mentioned that the dog days of summer really was a reference to Sirus the Dog Star in Canis Major. The ancient Romans believed Sirus, being so bright, must have contributed to the summer heat.

She continued to inform me that unfortunately the dogs days of summer coincide with the ancient heliacal rising of Sirius between July 3rd and August 11th. So technically, the dogs days of summer were over.

That's what I get for buying her those star charts.

Already Missed

Max already misses those tough negotiating session with Senator Kennedy. Yes, Max might have shredded a few bills in anger during their talks yet at the end of the day he knew the best possible legislation was being crafted.

You Betcha

Max bet Anna $20 that his new meds won't cause any compulsive gambling behavior.

The Edict of 1633

Anna is starting to plan how she will spend her upcoming bonus. She is talking about vacations and spas as she flips through the September issue of Vogue.

I know this threatens Max. He quite enjoys his place as self proclaimed fashion king and trend setter in the house. His talk about adding even more sumptuary laws to our household code of conduct just proves my point.

For now I am ignoring him. Anna earned her bonus and it is a nice break from the usual household conversations about F35 helmets and slow cooked pot roasts.

Another Episode of "Creepy Sundays"

"Um, I already looked and they do not sell kitty chippers - yeah." - Max

Lower... Lower...

While Anna prefers the upper deck of a stadium, Max loves his club level seating. There is something about the mix of thick cushions, carpet, and table service that makes him feel at home.

Given Max's neck problems, it made sense that he would have the screen at the new Dallas stadium lowered to easy club level viewing. Though, someone should have researched the height of a punt or kickoff before agreeing to his request regardless of funding.

Etymology

Being the world's preeminent etymologist, Anna was all wee wee'd up over our new found interest in the origin and meaning of words.

Door to Door

Despite all of his talk about pot roasts and bacon, Max really does love bell peppers, green beans, and tomatoes. Luckily Door to Door Organics limits the amount of grocery shopping time he needs to divert away from other hobbies.

Circle of Death

Max approves of the Denver Cruisers and their Circle of Death.

It's Not My Bag

Anna was so embarrassed at Obama's recent town hall meeting in Colorado. After reading about protesters in Arizona bringing assault rifles, she knew Max would have to bring his mini gun. And, of course, she just knew he would get tired of carrying it pretty quickly. For the rest of the day Anna had to explain to reporters she was just holding it for a friend. How embarrassing!

Competition

What was Max suppose to do?

That little girl next to him in Riverside Park was undercutting his lemonade stand by $3 a glass.

Another Episode of "Creepy Sundays"

"Um, I am a little nervous about what else goes backwards on backwards world - yeah." - Max

Bad Reception

Even Max didn't believe someone would ever mistake an oven door for a flat screen television. Otherwise he was have tried that scam ages ago.

Andromeda

As you know, Max takes infectious diseases very seriously. So when my rapid scan test came back inconclusive Max immediately declared a Wildfire Alert. Luckily for Denver, Max has a research facility with a level 5 biosafety certification. More importantly, only Anna can authorize Directive 7-12 to "cauterize" an infected population.

Lead Guitar

Anna crashes pretty hard after a concert; 3 hours playing lead guitar can do that to you.

Of course, she owes it all to her mentor Les Paul.

Ratings

Anna was listening to NPR this afternoon while crocheting one of her new patterns. We were both shocked to hear a Brazilian crime show might have committed murder in order to boost ratings. While the resemblance to the assassination of Howard Beale was rather creepy, Max's reaction was even more frightening: he just winked and started work on his weekly crime column now appearing in O Globo.

Otter Warning

Max knows how Brigitte France must feel after her run in with those foul otters. Though, in Max's case Anna simply explained that if you don't pull their whiskers then they won't bite you.

Schnitzel and Perogies

Max was not expecting to find Polish food on Colfax. Ethiopian or perhaps Greek but nothing north of the Danube. Well, after a tip from the chef at the Tap Room, Max found some authentic schnitzel and perogies. But, um, please don't tell his doctor.

Another Episode of "Creepy Sundays"

"Um, you remind me a of Grace Weston photo - yeah." - Max

Just Use FedEx

Anna was very upset today. She told Max to always use the DCD when shipping her packages. Using carrier pigeons for something as important as her cyborg experiments is ridiculous. Yes, it is cheaper but pigeons tend to drop things which always end up in the civilian media. And we all know the amount of paper work that causes.

No Rest For The Wicked

As Max likes to say, "Two working days until Monday." Sadly, this weekend he is not joking. The Metropolitan Police Service requested he lead the formal inquiry into the recent and mysterious death of Benson. I doubt Jude Law will be joining us but it will be a fun adventure none the less.

Blue?

I'm not sure how Max ended up in the Blue Dog Coalition. He never struck me as fiscally conservative.

Modernist

Anna was stunned and speechless over the loss of Charles Gwathmey. Unlike Max, she looked past his public works (e.g. - the Westport Library and Guggenheim) and found inspiration in his residential designs.

Revoked

For some reason the Turkish government frowns upon people who roll buildings into the street. It's not like Max meant to do it.

Smart Than You Think I Are

Max is not a fan of word problems. If a train leaves Boston going 25 mph and a train leaves New York City going 35 mph and the distance between... well, you get the idea.

So he was greatly relieved when his friend Britta told him this year's psychological evaluation would only have multiple choice questions; yearly evaluations are mandated by the terms of his employment with the city of Canterbury.

Of course, after learning the test results the all too familiar "Fish for Bwains" dance started again.

Another Episode of "Creepy Sundays"

"Um, Yo no hablo español, pero usted debe dejar el arma - yeah." - Max

Is It Over Yet?

Given Max's new heart medication, we started to avoid long movies. That wasn't a problem initially since we gladly missed the new Transformers movie and Bigelow gave us a private screening of The Hurt Locker. However, Max has been a huge fan of Alan Rickman every since Quigley Down Under. Therefore, when the new Harry Potter movie came out we had a problem.

Luckily, Anna's intern saved us. She used to work for the NIH and mentioned a cool website that tells you exactly when to take your breaks during a movie.

Now if only we could sneak a pot roast into the theater.